We believe that the solution to sex addiction must include counseling.
Why? Because the real problem is not the addiction to sex . Rather, sex addiction was a false "solution" that eventually became a problem. The real problem is past unresolved emotional trauma that continues to cause problems and pain in the addicts life.
In order to cope and deal with the pain caused by past trauma, the sex addict has "turned off" his real emotions because those emotions are too overwhelming. He uses the sex as a way to suppress and medicate the past emotional abuse and the memories associated with the abuse. Often, the sex addict can't see how his family system that he grew up with was destructive or abusive. A specialized trained sex addiction counselor can slowly guide you through what can be a painful and bewildering process.
Counseling addresses the root cause of sex addiction, which is unresolved emotional trauma that kept you from connecting with other people. And it is this trauma that needs to be healed in order for you to regain your freedom from sex addiction. Our counseling focuses on helping you learn how to cope with life and relationships without fleeing into the imaginary world of sex. By healing your emotional wounds and acknowledging your needs, you will re-learn to tell fact from fiction and will never be tricked into accepting false love again.
Finding a therapist who is knowledgeable about sexual addiction is critical. Because of the relative newness of the field, locating an informed counselor may be difficult. A counselor trained in sex addiction is the ideal choice, but unfortunately, such professionals are quite rare. Look first for a counselor who understands sexual addiction. Someone who doesn't understand sexual addiction can do more harm than good.
It's wise to interview the therapist to see if she/he seems to be an appropriate choice. Here are some suggested questions to ask:
- Are you trained in treating addictions and/or sexual addiction?
- Are you a Certified Sex Addiction Therapist (CSAT)?
- Have you heard of Dr. Patrick Carnes?
- Do you recommend the 12 Step program of recovery?
- Do you work from a trauma-based model in treating addictions?
- How many sexually addicted clients have you treated?
- What's your definition of sexual sobriety?
- What's your experience in helping spouses/partners of sex addicts?
- What about couples? How do you work with them?
- Does your counseling center have sex addiction counseling groups or spouses counseling group?
If married, nearly all wives of sex addicts are traumatized by the lies, deceptions, and-out-of-bounds sex behavior, and need treatment, too. The wife's wounding has to be addressed as well as have both parties participate in marital therapy. Click here to review information for the spouse or partner of a sex addict and the type of support FRCC provdives.
Our sex addiction counselors create a safe environment that is confidential and allows you to feel comfortable talking about your struggle to free yourself from sex or porn addictions. Our counselors believe that the keys to recovery include education, trauma resolution, connecting to other recovering porn addicts, accountability, and learning to establish balance in all areas of your life. Our treatment plan has three phases that our counselors use to help the porn addict recover and are as followed:
Phase 1 Treatment
• Weekly Individual Therapy
• Assessment and Treatment Plan
• Psychoeducation of Sexual Addiction
• Weekly Sex Addiction Counseling Group
• Facing the Shadow workbook
• Recovery and Relapse Prevention Plan
• Address health and legal issues
Phase II Treatment
• Attend 12-Step SA Group
• Agree on abstinence definition
• Work Recovery Plan
• 3- 6 month period of abstinence
• Group Counseling Work Presentations
Phase III Treatment
• Complete step 1 of 12-steps
• Developmental & Family-of-origin issues
• Experientially process past trauma and shame
• Multiple addiction assessment (Drugs, Alcohol, Work, etc.)
• Partner and family involvement
• Spiritual Issues
• Career Issues
The good news is that it will take less time to resolve the problem of sex addiction than it took to create it. Still, commitment to the process of healing from sex addiction is required. Without commitment results may be temporary and a relapse into the life of obsession with porn is very likely. Your commitment to the process of healing from sex addiction will be rewarded by the continually lessening urge to act out. It will become easier and easier to find other ways to deal with the stresses of life.
Recovery requires the addict to get into a regular pattern of tough recovery work. The addict is fighting to change many, many years of conditioning. Recovery will not occur overnight or even over a couple of weeks. Sex addiction recovery is a marathon, not a sprint! Get ready to work!
If you are wanting help with sex addiction, our counseling center provides individual, group, couples, and family counseling for sexual addiction. We also provide counseling and group support for the wife or partner of the sex addict.
Take our Sex Addiction Questionnaire:
There are two ways to setup an appointment with one of our counselors:
1) Fill out the Contact Form and a counselor will call you with 24-hours; 2) Call our offices at 303-933-5800.